Want to Avoid Youth Ministry Burnout? You Need a Rule of Life

Sustainability starts with structure.

I had a big youth ministry grant application due. That’s why I was working late. I’d come home, help put the kids to bed, and then it was straight into working on the application until bedtime.

As the deadline loomed, evenings weren’t enough. I started giving up my mornings too. Normally, I wake up early to have an uninterrupted hour of writing time. It’s often my favourite part of the day. But the demands of youth ministry called! So, goodbye precious writing time, hello another 60 minutes focused on youth ministry.

I know what you’re thinking: this isn’t sustainable. And your right. But at least things would settle down once the grant application was in. Except they didn’t. After I submitted the grant, there was a backlog of other tasks, and the extended work hours continued.

I wish I could say that this is a one-off. A cautionary little tale to kick off a post about sustainable ministry. But the truth is that this is the default.

Several times a year, I’ll find myself in a situation like this. Then I take a few days off, reset, and come back come back ready to start my new life as a youth minister who works sustainably.

Two months later, I’m right back in the same place.

Here’s what I’ve learned: self-awareness isn’t enough. Neither are good intentions. It’s not enough to want to do sustainable ministry. If I want to avoid burnout, I need something more. I need a Rule of Life.

What is a Rule of Life?

A Rule of Life is a structured framework of daily living that helps you to live an intentional and God-centred life. The idea has deep Christian roots, stretching back to the third-century Desert Fathers, who retreated into the wilderness to live lives of poverty, prayer and work.

The most well-known “Rule” was developed by St Benedict in the sixth century. His “Rule” organized monastic life into a daily rhythm of prayer, work, and community. It became the foundation for nearly every monastic order that followed.

Here’s a look into what a day shaped by the Benedictine Rule looks like:

• 3:30 AM – Wake

• 4:00 AM – Vigils (communal prayer)

• 5:30 AM – Lauds (communal prayer), followed by Mass and breakfast

• 8:45 AM – Terce (communal prayer)

• 9:00 AM – Manual labor

• 12:45 PM – End of work

• 1:00 PM – Sext (communal prayer) and main meal

• 2:00 PM – None (communal prayer)

• 2:15 PM – Study or personal time

• 5:30 PM – Vespers (communal prayer)

• 6:15 PM – Light meal

• 7:30 PM – Compline (communal prayer), then silence until morning

Despite the 3:30AM wake up, a Rule is Life isn’t meant to be a burden. The Latin word regula, from which we get “rule,” was used to refer to a trellis —a wooden structure that supports and guides the growth of grapevines. In the same way, a Rule of Life provides us with structure, not to make things harder, but so that we can thrive.

Developing a Rule of Life

You’re not a monk. But if you’re reading this, you’re probably someone who wants to live more intentionally and sustainably. That’s what a Rule of Life can give you. You don’t need to pray seven times a day. But you do need habits and boundaries that sustain you.

Start by identifying key areas of your life:

• Faith

• Health

• Relationships

• Work

• Technology

• Rest

Then ask: What routines or boundaries do I need in each of these areas?

My Rule of Life has a couple of commitments in each area, but the four core commitments are:

• 30 minutes of daily prayer

• 50 minutes of morning writing time

• Exercising 3 times a week

• Quality time with my wife one night per week

Your Rule doesn’t need to read like a five-page list of practices worthy of a canonised saint. Start small. Choose a few core habits that you genuinely want to commit to. Once these habits are established in your life, you can always add more.

Living By Your Rule

Writing your Rule is easy. The challenge is living it out. Remember, if you’ve added something to your Rule, you’re not just making a suggestion to your future self. You’re declaring: The practice is essential for my sustainability and growth. It takes priority.

What that means if that if I’m feeling the pressure to catch up on emails in the evening, but it’s my workout night, I prioritise the exercise. And if I just want to blob in front of the TV, but I haven’t prayed, then prayer comes first.

There are exceptions. That grant applications I shared about earlier was for a six-figure investment in youth ministry. It was worth the extra hours. But exceptions should be rare. And when they happen, the goal is always to return to your Rule as soon as possible.

A Firm Foundation

In youth ministry, overwork is the default. There will always be more to do, more young people to care for, more needs waiting to be met. If you let it, ministry will consume every minute of free time you have.

For me, productivity hacks weren’t enough. Time off helped, but only for a while. What I needed was a framework that could guide how I lived each day.

If you feel like the demands of your ministry are stopping you from living the intentional, God-centred life you long for, a Rule of Life might be what you’re missing. It’s a solid foundation that you can keep coming back to, a handful of core commitments that remind you: This is the life I want. These are the things that matter most.